• Welcome Notice

    Welcome Guest to SexForum!

    New Zealand’s Fastest Growing Adult Entertainment Forum!

Funny stories

Funny stories
C

Curb My Enthusiasm

Veteran
563
642
93
2025 has been a great punting year, full of fun and memorable experiences. As I reflect on it, a few funny moments stand out.

I would like to hear any recent or past stories you can share to bring some humor to the forum.
 
I will try and kick things off with one of my previous experiences. This the year I had a session booked at a premise where there are multiple rooms used by the ladies. It must have been a busy time, because 10 minutes before our booking I messaged the lady that I have parked the car and I will knock on the door at the exact time our session had been arranged to start.

To stay discrete quite often independent profiles do not have their faces showing. This adds to the excitement as you have a rough idea on the body shape of the woman but the face can be a mystery.

So I rock up to the premise and ring the bell on the dot. The door slowly opens and I am greeted into the premise by a very attractive woman who has good vibes and a welcoming smile. At this stage I am very happy with the physical appearance and I have a good feeling the fs session is going to be great.

I introduce myself for a bit of chit chat and then I say you must be xyz? Then things start clicking into place and we both realise that we are meeting up with the wrong person. In the confusion I tell her that I have a booking with a different working girl name. We then leave the room and walk into the central hallway where I am now talking with two beautiful woman and we are trying to figure out which magical door my lady is hiding behind.

Eventually a door creaks open and I see a smiling face looking through a small gap with a wry smile as I am ushered into the correct room. In the end it was a funny way to start but it was a great session.

And now thinking about it I also should have asked the first lady what her working name was so I could book her in the future.
 
A few years ago - had seen this woman on NZG whose photo's looked stunning and as I was in that area one evening I made a booking.
It had been raining all day and I did not want to park on the street so pulled into her driveway and then reversed on to (what I thought was ) paved grass.. tapped on the door and the woman who answered the door was nothing at all like to woman I was expecting, basis B&S, so politely declined. I went back to the car which by then was stuck in the lawn and all attempts to move it ended up in a whole lot of mud being sprayed onto the fence and my car sinking deeper in to the quagmire . ...
It was dark , pissing with rain and the WG spoke little or no English (Chinese) so when I tapped on her door again and tried to explain the situation it did not go well .. I was hoping she might have some cardboard boxes, or logs in the back so tried to explain this to her without much success.. I then tried to entice her out of her doorway so she could see my predicament which just made her even more worried. Eventually she got it but obviously was not going to be able to help anyway. I then did my best charades of calling AA, which was fine but there was going ton be a 90 minute delay.
By this time I was soaked through and this kind lady who had put up with me walking on her booking invited me in for a cup of tea, and gave me a towel to dry myself down with . . . .I thanked her and them made to go and sit in my car but she gently grabbed my arm and gestured to a seat, as I was turning I rested my hand on her bum and from then on a bit of flirtatious touching and next thing she is leading me to the bedroom .. .. .. .. . sex was had, (she was not the lady in the pics but not bad to look at ) it wasn't spectacular but seemed to a fitting part to the saga. Business must have been slow as she gave me a great massage afterwards and did not want any extra payment for what ended up being about 2 hours .
Eventually the tow truck turned up, I was towed off the front lawn having left great big indents in the grass and never came back ..:) !

I often wonder how that might have turned out if I had been rude, dismissive, angry in that first interaction. .. .. must be a lesson there
 
Westwards said:
Please, Log in or Register to view quote content!
Click to expand...
I must admit to having a soft spot for the older Asian MILF/GILF. I once went to a well known place in Takapuna where it was such a lady who presented herself to me. I had booked to see a lady in her twenties for 2 hours of massage and sex. I thought it was a b'n's and though older, (like a lot older) she was very trim and quite attractive, so I thought WTF.

What followed was an incredible two hours of just mind-blowing action with a marvelous massage thrown in. She really acted the ultimate courtesan for me and I couldn't have been happier until.........................


........................... I walked out the door to leave, Then this utterly young, perfect vision was in front of me and my now lady friend said, this is who you booked . I was gob smacked in spite of the great time I had just had . Went back two days later and yes..........................


............................ she was a total starfish and waste of money.


Went back to see the original lady a few times until I left Auckland and she never disappointed. Just goes to show
 
Earlier in the year, I attempted to make a booking at an SM place only for the particular person to be unavailable. The receptionist mentioned that they had a personal issue to attend to so the next time I booked, I picked up a small treat to bring along for them.

It was my first time actually bringing a gift (in this case, it was a sampler of macaroons) so I called the receptionist and asked a few logistical questions ie; is there a fridge, do the girls have access to the fridge etc.

Anyway, I asked "Is it alright if I bring along small gifts?" only for the receptionist to reply "You want to... bring along small kids?"

Thankfully, she quickly realised she had misheard me and we had a good laugh about it rather than my
Please, Log in or Register to view URLs content!
.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top