Request Elle - back in chch???
Johnnymac
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So speaks an absolute moron.
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I guess it's not your fault, but you're really stupid. It's obvious what gone on here, some random down on her luck SW has mounted some random attack on a dude she's never seen.
And you're dumb enough to buy into it. Pathetic
What exactly do you think this place is? It a fucking review forum! Where the fuck do you get off coming on here and attacking another punter? Go read the fucking thread! The facts stand out as plain as your stupidity.
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This is actually a valid point.
Some of the guys here are clearly reviewing in the way they do because it's like bragging to the boys about the bird they shagged from the bar.
Except because it's an escort they can't brag anywhere but here.
Its got nothing do to do with reviewing the service. It's about being able to brag to the boys. Because they cant in real life without being mocked for paying for it.
My 2c on what's going on psychologically for at least a portion of johns.
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Sounds like a wife?
To give my comment context I seem to recall Johnny coming on here late at night recently bemoaning about how a young escort had cancelled his booking after she followed up on SWer intel. The thread was then taken down.
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Not all of us act like Neanderthals here Elle and actually manage to give recommendations and comments in a respectful manner without having to revert to the so called "locker room chat" and do actually try and call out some of the shit behaviour seen here at times
Johnnymac
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If you had even a micro brain
you will have noted, that the post in question, was subsequently edited and annotated, with a statement that Lilliana and I had sorted things. The thread was then removed (with Liliana’s assent) at my request.
Do you really have to be such a dumb trolling cunt @Mikehunt?
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Who the fuck comes on here and has arguments with escorts they have seen like a little bitch anyway
.. you seem to have a few. you might as well be one you hormonal cunt.. I bet you have bitch titsyeah, from memory he was alone in his cold car at 10pm waiting for the last booking of the night and that sloppy goodness never came through
Johnnymac
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You are just pig shit
thick. What the fuck are you doing on here? It’s obvious that you can’t read. Guess your mum helps you out.
might be time to make like the real JohnnyMac and retire for a bit lol @Johnnymac come back when you've calmed down.
I’m here to share my experiences with the hookers of nz .. I’m here to let the boys know who’s good and who’s bad, to help them spend there whore jar money wisely. You seem to be here just have arguments with them and have bitch fights like a little upset school girl
I can confirm Mackem is a complete gentleman both in and outside of bookings
Mike and @kennyt as much I would enjoy to keep giving JM shit about this as it was a clanger. I do believe she was keen not to be on here and haver it gone.
Or we could just leave their name out of it
as it is funWhat did chchd say? All I saw was "You are ignoring content by this member.".
ManBehavingBadly
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I heard they're turning this thread into a movie. It's called "The Bitch is Back". It's a dark take on the classic love triangle where Johnny initially falls for one Elle but then turns against her, and then the other Elle steps in and blows their whole world apart. Jack Nicholson is rumoured to be starring as Johnny, and there's a nod to that classic scene from the shining when Elle discovers Johnny's computer with a half-finished forum post:
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
...
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
All hate and no love makes Johnny a creepy boy
...
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Babenco
Elite
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Ode to Johnny Mac and Elle (WGTN), a FAKE SATTIRE punt review:
So, decided to bite a bullet and book Elle for a 1 hour standard service. Blowjob and full sex. She messaged back and listed extras at my request.
-$50 I don't knock u out, dump you in the red zone hogtied with a face full of my superior woman turd.
-$50 you can talk or make other sounds during booking.
-$50 you don't have to constantly apologise during booking for being not only male, but the kind of disgusting fucked up worthless piece of shit male that pays incredible powerful unique goddess perfect woman sex workers to have sex.
Decided on $50 don't get beat up and shat on , no other extras.
Arrived 5 minutes early, and was told to stay in my fucking car until the agreed fucking time fucking loser male shit cunt. No problem, my bad.
Arrive at door and Elle is a masterpiece of indignation. Head tilted 45 degrees sideways. Hands on hips. Looks my up and down and rolls her eyes. Imagine your face when you put one of those super sour lollies in your mouth, and then remove all the liquid from your skin. Now double that. That's how tense she looked. "Hmmpf, just as I suspected, another fucking male."
So........, paperwork out of the way. Sent to have shower with plenty of cleaning goods available. Mouthwash, soap, electric toothbrush, floss, hand sanitizer, dettol, surgical iodine, and a metal scourer. I used all of them out of a deep concern that if she screwed her face up any tighter her cranium might implode.
Elle is fully clothed on the bed, and asks me to put most of my clothes back on, however I was allowed to leave my penis out so that I could self apply a somewhat unusual looking condom she gave me. It looks a lot like a balloon animal type ballon. I think it actually is one, it's a yellow one! It hurts but I'm too scared not to force it over. It turns a shade of green soon after its applied. Ready for the blowjob? You will never have had one like this." Elle struts her way to the far side of the room and asks me to point my penis in her general direction. She puckers her lips......and literally blows a puff of air towards me, with a similar intensity to how a 2 year old might blow out 2 candles, only minus the excitement and motivation.
She spits out the window, I'm guessing in case a quantum amount of nob flavour may have reflected back from the inside of the Dunlop cocoon.
"Alright then let's fucking get it over with". I could tell she was moist with anticipation. "Now the rules are that I....shall fuck you......you may not thrust.....you may not touch me with your dirty little man hands.....you may not moan/grunt/talk/whistle/whimper or try to sniff the air in the hope of enjoying my scent (disgusting worm). You will present your filthy pathetic excuse for an appendage , and I will place my vagina on to it. As it is a 60 minute booking, you will cum within 25 seconds or not cum at all. You break ANY of my fucking rules, and I will have the entire Wellington Roller derby team skate on your fucking balls until your scrotum is flattened enough to tear off and use as a leather purse to put the money you paid in. Do I make myself clear..... male?
I nod eagerly. Cause I'm terrified to do otherwise. She kneels on the bed and loads up her ******** MAGA page and a 24 second timer. She hikes up her faux denim skirt just enough to reveal a hole made in her undies just big enough to squeeze a nob thru but not enough to see anything. I struggle to feel aroused, but by now enough swelling has occurred from the strangulating condom that it's firm enough to try. She applies half a tube of glycerol. "Tip only mutherfucker". I oblige.
24 seconds passes quicker than expected, and I'm almost relieved when she pulls off and struts to the toilet to guff any trace of me out immediately.
I manage to remove the balloon, thank fuck my my Swiss army keyring! I'm sore, but strangely unsatisfied.
She ushers me to the door. She rips my wallet from my pants and rolls her eyes when she finds it empty "What? No tip? Cheap useless incel cunt fucking y-bromosome infected non-female waste of space. Oh well, I hated every second of this booking, but at least you kept to the rules. Tell you what I'll give you a $5 discount on your next booking."
I turn to face her at the doorway, and pluck up the courage to speak for the first time "............do you offer any domme services? .........'
"Of course I fucking don't you numbskull braindead male fuck head. Read the fucking advert properly you cunt. By the way, what's your name again?"
"I'm Johnny Mac. I told you we had never met before!!" Her eyelids disappear into her skull, and her now bloodshot eyeballs pop out and almost hit me in the face. I turn and start to sprint down the road, as I look back she is dropping behind, but is now wielding an actual rolling pin, which I am sure she has somehow magically transmutated from thin air using the only sheer intensity of her own man-hateful mind energy. Luckily I'm nimble enough to escape out of sight.
I run all the way home to my lazy boy leather recliner, and feel invigorated and alive.
Elle (wgtn)
Face = pH1
BJ 0/10
Sex 0/10
Sprint 1/10
So, decided to bite a bullet and book Elle for a 1 hour standard service. Blowjob and full sex. She messaged back and listed extras at my request.
-$50 I don't knock u out, dump you in the red zone hogtied with a face full of my superior woman turd.
-$50 you can talk or make other sounds during booking.
-$50 you don't have to constantly apologise during booking for being not only male, but the kind of disgusting fucked up worthless piece of shit male that pays incredible powerful unique goddess perfect woman sex workers to have sex.
Decided on $50 don't get beat up and shat on , no other extras.
Arrived 5 minutes early, and was told to stay in my fucking car until the agreed fucking time fucking loser male shit cunt. No problem, my bad.
Arrive at door and Elle is a masterpiece of indignation. Head tilted 45 degrees sideways. Hands on hips. Looks my up and down and rolls her eyes. Imagine your face when you put one of those super sour lollies in your mouth, and then remove all the liquid from your skin. Now double that. That's how tense she looked. "Hmmpf, just as I suspected, another fucking male."
So........, paperwork out of the way. Sent to have shower with plenty of cleaning goods available. Mouthwash, soap, electric toothbrush, floss, hand sanitizer, dettol, surgical iodine, and a metal scourer. I used all of them out of a deep concern that if she screwed her face up any tighter her cranium might implode.
Elle is fully clothed on the bed, and asks me to put most of my clothes back on, however I was allowed to leave my penis out so that I could self apply a somewhat unusual looking condom she gave me. It looks a lot like a balloon animal type ballon. I think it actually is one, it's a yellow one! It hurts but I'm too scared not to force it over. It turns a shade of green soon after its applied. Ready for the blowjob? You will never have had one like this." Elle struts her way to the far side of the room and asks me to point my penis in her general direction. She puckers her lips......and literally blows a puff of air towards me, with a similar intensity to how a 2 year old might blow out 2 candles, only minus the excitement and motivation.
She spits out the window, I'm guessing in case a quantum amount of nob flavour may have reflected back from the inside of the Dunlop cocoon.
"Alright then let's fucking get it over with". I could tell she was moist with anticipation. "Now the rules are that I....shall fuck you......you may not thrust.....you may not touch me with your dirty little man hands.....you may not moan/grunt/talk/whistle/whimper or try to sniff the air in the hope of enjoying my scent (disgusting worm). You will present your filthy pathetic excuse for an appendage , and I will place my vagina on to it. As it is a 60 minute booking, you will cum within 25 seconds or not cum at all. You break ANY of my fucking rules, and I will have the entire Wellington Roller derby team skate on your fucking balls until your scrotum is flattened enough to tear off and use as a leather purse to put the money you paid in. Do I make myself clear..... male?
I nod eagerly. Cause I'm terrified to do otherwise. She kneels on the bed and loads up her ******** MAGA page and a 24 second timer. She hikes up her faux denim skirt just enough to reveal a hole made in her undies just big enough to squeeze a nob thru but not enough to see anything. I struggle to feel aroused, but by now enough swelling has occurred from the strangulating condom that it's firm enough to try. She applies half a tube of glycerol. "Tip only mutherfucker". I oblige.
24 seconds passes quicker than expected, and I'm almost relieved when she pulls off and struts to the toilet to guff any trace of me out immediately.
I manage to remove the balloon, thank fuck my my Swiss army keyring! I'm sore, but strangely unsatisfied.
She ushers me to the door. She rips my wallet from my pants and rolls her eyes when she finds it empty "What? No tip? Cheap useless incel cunt fucking y-bromosome infected non-female waste of space. Oh well, I hated every second of this booking, but at least you kept to the rules. Tell you what I'll give you a $5 discount on your next booking."
I turn to face her at the doorway, and pluck up the courage to speak for the first time "............do you offer any domme services? .........'
"Of course I fucking don't you numbskull braindead male fuck head. Read the fucking advert properly you cunt. By the way, what's your name again?"
"I'm Johnny Mac. I told you we had never met before!!" Her eyelids disappear into her skull, and her now bloodshot eyeballs pop out and almost hit me in the face. I turn and start to sprint down the road, as I look back she is dropping behind, but is now wielding an actual rolling pin, which I am sure she has somehow magically transmutated from thin air using the only sheer intensity of her own man-hateful mind energy. Luckily I'm nimble enough to escape out of sight.
I run all the way home to my lazy boy leather recliner, and feel invigorated and alive.
Elle (wgtn)
Face = pH1
BJ 0/10
Sex 0/10
Sprint 1/10
Euripides
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Hate to admit it but Old Amy is now #2 Top Escort in NZ
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